Friday, December 7, 2012

What Was Missing From Our Puzzle Was Jonah

Last Saturday we celebrated having you for your first year in the world. Most importantly, in our world, in our home, and deep in our hearts.
Throughout my pregnancy I wondered as many mamas do, about how their heart/lap/home/budget (but mostly their hearts) will stretch any further to love another little person the way they intensely love already. I worried if you would get enough attention, affection, smiles, rocking, reading, playing, silliness, and hugs.
 
Our life felt so full with the three of us (four counting the dog) and work and friends and marriage and every other opportunity/disaster that comes down life’s bumpy path. At that point I saw our life as an already completed puzzle put together in its entirety.
 
But, you proved me so wrong. You wiggled yourself into the crevices of our family puzzle and before I knew it you had made a new, wonderful, and much needed space for yourself. You treated us well with your good sleeping, giggles, and huge smiles. Your appetite is not only huge for every tidbit of food, but for everything new you find. You point and grin to show me things like a fish tank as if I hadn’t seen one before. And, it’s true. That fish tank at the pediatrician’s office yesterday came alive with more movement and color than I ever took the time to notice because of you and your short, pudgy finger and goofy smile.
 
During my pregnancy, I also wondered what it would be like between you and your brother. It started slow for him to understand that you were growing slowly and had to be treated gently. But, now one of the most heartwarming moments is to watch you play together. If your brother’s bedroom door closes, you wait and scratch at it like a puppy wanting him to come back and play.
 
You are the vital, finishing piece we never knew was missing. Like in a painting that seems done, but when a splash of red or orange is added in the corner it comes alive. Or the tiny dash of nutmeg that makes a pumpkin pie taste heavenly.

 
You have assured that our laps will have no vacancies for a quite a while.

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